June 4, 2007 (Gotcha!!!)

Consider yourselves warned...this post is a LONG one. This was the day we'd been waiting for! One year ago on this day we were introduced to our daughter. Let me just say that she wasn't quite as thrilled about meeting her new parents as we were to meet her. Some of the photos may surprise you a bit. They were a bit painful for me to look through today. We all know a beautiful happy little girl who is about to celebrate her second birthday, but I remember that it took some time before we saw a lot of her joyful and playful personality. This was one of the most incredible days of our lives, and the days that followed were very emotional for all of us as we learned about being a family.

We started our morning with a walk after breakfast. We were invited to head out for a "10 minute" walk. Yeah right. :) We walked at least 20 minutes I think. Remember how hot it is now. Not at all what we're used to here in the midwest. I wrote that it was over 90 degrees with 95% humidity. To the local people, this was nothing. In fact many people we encountered on the sidewalk were actually in long sleeves.

Anyway, we made it, picked up diapers, formula, snacks, wipes, and a few other things before we made our way back to the Wharton. Some of our group took a cab, but we walked...and survived. :) We sent our laundry out that afternoon. Due to the heat, we were quickly running out of clean (and dry) clothes.

On Our Way to the Market
Also, here we are in the formula aisle. We really didn't know what we were doing, but somehow we came out of there with the right kind.






















We had a meeting after our grocery excursion. We had some paperwork to complete and we were able to see an updated photo of Hope. We could hardly believe how she'd changed. Here is Hannah (local guide) with Tu (Crossroads guide) getting things all sorted out for us.








FINALLY, at about 3:00 we decided we just couldn't sit in the room any longer. Guess we weren't the only ones. Most of our group was already in the lobby waiting for our 3:30 departure. So, we gathered for some before photos.
Mommies - Daddies - Families

























You can see the everyone's intensity as we rode silently to the Civil Affairs Office.










Once we arrived, everything seemed to happen so quickly. We took an elevator to the 4th floor where we were told to enter the room on the right. AAAHHHH!!!! There she is...in the doorway of the room to our left. Open the flood gates. Here come the tears. I tried to pull it together, but wasn't very successful. We all lined up around the room, the Civil Affairs Officer called the names of the girls, and then the new mothers were presented with their daughters.

















Hope screamed! She was sobbing before she was handed to us, but the transition to our arms didn't improve her mood. She certainly didn't want anything to do with her new Mama. She kicked and screamed and pushed me away from the start. It was pretty hard to take. I don't think that all the adoption workshops and attachment seminars in the world could truly have prepared me for what I was feeling. We certainly knew that it was typical for a child to choose one parent over the other, but holy cow does it hurt when it happens.

Anyway, just look ahead at the following photos. You can even see in one of the photos with Ron, we had a hard time just getting Hope to allow one of us to hold her face to face. This is certainly not uncommon either. But it was so hard to watch this tiny little girl grieve so severely and hurt so much. So, while these first few moments as parents were magical and our hearts were overflowing, our hearts were also breaking for the pain we were witnessing in our daughter's cries.











Here are three close-ups from Tu.



Hope fell asleep on her new Daddy's shoulder on the bus back to the hotel. When we got off the bus, Ron passed her to me and I had my first tender moment holding her without tears. Oh my gosh we were so in love!


We went across the hall to Andy and Betsy's room to borrow a little computer time and post this photo for our family and friends at home.

Once Hope woke up again, she was terrified. We tried to calm her down by walking outside around the hotel. Ron just carried her and I kept my distance a bit. He was continuously trying to reinforce to her that we are her Mama and Baba and she is our little bao bao. (I'm not sure about the spelling there, but that is what it sounds like and we were told it means "treasure.")







Once we were playing on the floor we were beginning to see some of Hope's curiosity coming through.












I was able to feed Hope a little dinner of fruit and congee that night. She wouldn't take a bottle from us yet though. She fell asleep at about 8:00 in my arms after a quick bath.


She slept until about 1:30 at which time she finally had something to drink. She had almost a full bottle and fell back to sleep until 5:30 the next morning. Not too bad for our first night together. I wish I could say that I got some sleep. :) I was too busy peeking over the edge of the crib to watch our sweet girl finally at peace in dreamland.

June 3, 2007

So here is where things start to get a bit sketchy with our blogging last year. Some of the information and almost all of the photos will probably be new to everyone. Enjoy.

After our final Beijing post our laptop hard-drive crashed. UGH! Talk about frustrating. We carried a busted camcorder and a non-functioning lap top all over China for two weeks. Think about the weight we could have left at home. :) I was terrified that we'd lost all of our downloaded Beijing photos. Luckily Ron had also put them on the iPod so once we were home he was able to purchase a program to retrieve the photos from there. Everything on our computer was lost. We were so bitter. You may have heard me screaming "TECHNOLOGY SUCKS!!!" here in WI. :)

Well, we had to get over it. We were on our way to meet our little girl. Today was the day we flew from Beijing to Nanning, Guangxi. I think Lisa's comment last year said something like, "it isn't about the gadgets anyway...." She was (and is) so right. We had some pretty important things to take care of while we were in China, so no matter how disappointed we were we'd better get our priorities in order.

I remember being pretty upset about the inconvenient timing of our laptop's demise, but I don't remember deciding to finally get up at 3:30 because I couldn't sleep any more. According to my writing, I guess I had plenty of time to get our things packed for the trip. Tu joined our group that morning and I'm quite sure we were all thrilled to have her leading us. It was nice to have someone take control of everything since our emotional state was pretty anxious now. Our plane was delayed about a half hour that afternoon before our turbulent three hour flight to Nanning. Thank goodness for motion sickness patches.
At the Airport - Waiting
Hey! We're adoptive parents. We're pretty darn good at waiting. ;)


Boy were we in for a shock when we got off the plane that afternoon.

We thought it was hot in Beijing. I guess we didn't know what HOT was. Instant sweat. At least the AC was functioning on our waiting bus and our hotel was comfortable. YIKES! We knew we'd need to be careful though because that was the climate Hope was used to. We couldn't bring her into our frigid room and expect her to be happy about it. We were already expecting her to make some incredible sacrifices so if we could keep her temperature comfortable that would be important.

We arrived at about 6:00 to get checked in to the Wharton Hotel. We knew we'd feel comfortable there for the week. Everything was just beautiful in spite of the rock hard mattresses. As we opened our door, this was the most beautiful sight:

WE HAVE A CRIB IN OUR ROOM!!! - insert tears here. :)

Upcoming Schedule:
Dinner with the group tonight
10:00 tomorrow morning-group meeting (paperwork and baby updates)
Shopping
Meet our daughters at 3:30!!!!!

This is a photo of the soon-to-be big sisters trying out their chopsticks at dinner. They were such great travelers!

Here was the birthday cake Tu arranged to have ready for Betsy. Check out all that yummy fruit!


Here are a couple shots of the river from the boardwalk behind our hotel. At night, there are valves that open up on that bridge and it becomes a beautiful laser-lit waterfall.

June 2, 2007

Our final day in Beijing wasn't quite as busy as the day before. We visited more of the city's landmarks, had a little down time and some birthday cake for Betsy during the afternoon, and ended by going to an acrobat show. I was able to write about most of our day last year so I will use that post again here with (***) a few additions. Here is what I had to say that evening:
~~~~~~~~~~
We didn't pack so much into this day. It was nice to be able to determine our own schedule. We ended up working as a group to book a private tour of the Forbidden City and Tian' anmen Square.

We met for breakfast at 6:45 this morning. The buffet has been very good. They have an assortment of dry cereal and juices, fruits, breads, and a line-up of hot foods such as various sausages, potato cakes, boiled eggs, beans with tomato sauce, dim sum, ham, bacon, fried rice, made to order eggs, and congee. Some have asked us about congee. This is what most of our daughters are probably eating every day. It is sort of a soupy rice. It doesn't have much flavor at all. Most people seem to be adding sweetener. It seems like rice that has been cooked in water for a very long time so it becomes super soft and the water is very starchy.

This morning our tour left at about 8:30. Our guide today was Benny, a college English teacher by profession, and tour guide during his extra time. His English was very clear. He seemed to really have a wealth of knowledge about the places we visited. I just wish I'd have had some way to write it all down. My memory of all the details from today is pretty weak.

*** Here is a view of the Temple of Heaven from our van. This is definitely on the list of places to visit next time. ***

We began our walk at Tian' anmen Square (which means "gate of heavenly peace"). Benny talked about the circle structure of Beijing City. Originally, Beijing was built in a series of rings (4, I think) surrounded by walls. There were 9 gates to the city on the outer ring and only 4 at the center leading into the Forbidden City.



We found geocache #250 today in Tian' anmen Square at the focal monument to lost soldiers there. It was a virtual cache, so we just posed in front of the structure with gps in hand. YEA!!! #250 - IN CHINA! Also today was special as there were children standing 'at attention' in front of the monument because (if I understood correctly) yesterday was a children's holiday of some sort.

*** Here is a photo of the children. We've since learned that June 1 is Children's Day in China. Isn't that a wonderful idea? ***

*** This is one of my favorite photos from this day. Betsy is taking a few seconds here to honor children of her own. Many of us had lanyards or other tags with our referral photos so we could wear them and have them with us for our trip. I just happened to catch this moment with Betsy dreaming about the daughter she was about to meet. ***

*** These uniforms were present at all of the national landmarks we visited. If our memory is correct, the green guard is military and the blue uniform is from the police. ***

There is an official government building to the west (I think) where representatives from every province meet once every 5 years there for formal meetings. There were many questions about what happens now at these historical places. For the most part they are all being preserved as museums, but that one large building in particular is still used for some official business.

The other very special place at Tian' anmen Square is the monument to honor Chairman Mao. This is a place that is very recognized in pictures.

This one is for you, Brian.



I have to comment on the vendors...PUSHY vendors in this area. They are all selling postcard packets, kites, hats, tourist books, and "Mao Mao" watches. I don't understand how they all rush you at once, watch you say "no" to the first few people, and still come up and ask you to purchase the very same things. They have been a bit of a challenge for some of us. it is frustrating to have swarms of people around you ALL the time with no escape.

We have one member of our group who is certainly drawing some extra attention. Lexi = rock star. She has been touched, stared at, tugged on, hugged, offered food, posed for pictures with local children and adults, and she is still smiling. She has been such a great little traveler so far and she has handled it all with lots of inner grace. She is loved.



From Tian' anmen Square, we crossed the street through a tunnel to the Forbidden City. This area was so much larger and more extravagant that I could have imagined. We were taught a little more about fung shui and the placement of the buildings and arrangement other things inside the city. There is a manmade river called the "Golden River." There is an "Outer Golden River" that acts as a sort of moat around the city, and an "Inner Golden River" around the imperial area. The water is to act as a barrier to prevent good fortune from leaving. Surrounding mountains are to act as wind barriers to prevent good fortune from being swept away.
*** Info at the entrance ***

*** These next couple of photos show some of the construction that was taking place as Beijing prepared to welcome the world for the Olympic Games. You can also see Benny and some of our group in the second shot. ***



*** Info about this Empress Chamber ***


Ron & Andy



We've learned that almost everything is symbolic of something.
Colors for example - Gold = Royal Color; Red = Celebration; Green Jade = Happiness
Phoenix = Empress, feminine grace, beauty
Dragon = Emperor, strength, power (Also, it is interesting that in America we typically associate Dragons with breath of fire whereas in China, Dragons are associated with water).
Elephants = peace
It is all so fascinating. Where a person sleeps means something. What bridge a person was allowed represented status in ancient times. All of the animals of the Chinese zodiac represent various qualities. And so much more! It seems like everything means something.

The lions each are special as well. Apparently, in ancient times, the female was displayed with her paw on the child as she controlled the family. And, the male rested his paw on the globe, as he controlled the world. Reactions?

And another - The branch-interlocked cypresses symbolize loyal love. It is said that Puyi and Wanrong, the last emperor and empress of the Qing dynasty, had their photograph taken in front of the trees after their wedding ceremony to show that "we wish to fly in heaven, two birds with one pair of wings, and to grow together on earth, two trees with branches interlaced." (copied from a nearby sign)

Also the Forbidden City is home to our #251 geocache. We were able to leave the group for a quick rest while we took about 10 minutes (and our guide) to hunt this one down. This cache is called "Case Closed." We were to find something surrounded by 5 ft. tall glass (NOT grass as I was searching for grass for the longest time). :) Anyway, we found it with little trouble. Much thanks goes to Benny for leading us around the maze of buildings. When we arrived, we found a very large quartz crystal of some kind. I overheard another guide explaining the the Emperor wanted his Queen and all his concubines to be as pure as the crystal. Huh? OK. Like I said before...everything represents something. :)

*** Here is our group as they waited for us to return from our geocaching excursion. ***


*** Two more with scenery from the Forbidden City/Imperial Gardens ***


*** This was our view as we exited the Forbiden City and looked behind us. ***

We also were treated to a yummy surprise tonight. It is Betsy's (another expecting Mom from our group) birthday tomorrow and her very sweet husband (careful Andy, if you're reading this) bought her a cake and invited us all to surprise her before we left for the theater. OOPS - a slight backfire...as we got off the elevator to go to her room, Betsy was just coming down the hallway toward us. "Betsy, what are you doing out here?" Oh, well.

Our evening was exciting with the performance of the Chinese Acrobats. Skill! Flexibility! Focus & Determination! It was really an amazing show. I would guess that some of the youngest performers were maybe about 6 yrs. old. It was a very cool thing to see.

*** It is so strange to think that while we were busy enjoying the amazing Chinese culture and Beijing sights, our little girls were probably embarking on the first leg of their trip to Nanning as they returned to the orphanage from their foster homes. How heartbreaking for them. They had no idea that their lives were about to be turned upside down...again. We, their new families, were totally giddy with anticipation while these six little angels were bravely on their way to meet us. There is no way we can even begin to comprehend the experiences of the next few days from the girls' perspective. All I can say is that we were all so ready to meet our daughters.

A year ago tomorrow we got on a plane bound for southern China. We were so close to having our Hope in our arms!!! ***